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Humility is futile

My mom's group had a banquet last night, and I was unable to attend due to Marvin's work schedule. They had a "best of" awards ceremony and I was nominated "probably the smartest person in the room." I am glad I was not there, because I would have been so embarrassed!
I know I am intelligent, but there is something about pitting myself intellectually against another that makes me blush. It seems so pompous to tout myself on a silver platter. The award makes me wonder: did I brag about myself too much, do I make others feel poorly about themselves, or am I that big of a nerd? Upon writing this, I did realize one conversation that may have led to this nomination: my high school science project titled "Determining the Coefficient of Thermal Expansion using a 630 nm He-Ne Laser." I do not recall how this topic came up, but hopefully that was the primary factor in my nomination. Being that there are many other wise women in the group, I do not want to appear to think I am smarter than they are!
I don't know what it is about American society, but it seems to both ostracize and idolize the intelligent. It was very hard for me socially in middle and high school; it was embarrassing to be the smart girl (I also had the stigma of the "Bible girl" but that was a whole other issue). I had a tendency to befriend students in other grades or academic classes; my friends knew I was sharp, but never were fully aware of what I was capable of. I did not mind being near the top of my class, but didn't want to be on top. I guess I wanted to coast just far enough under the radar that I still registered, but wasn't seen as a threat. I guess truly that's how I still feel today!

Time in a bottle

As I have gotten older, time seems to feel more irrelevant. What is that saying about the days growing longer, but the years are growing shorter? I graduated high school eight years ago, and have been married over six years! However, both of those events seem like they were just the other day.....

It's that time of year again....

I am fully aware that this is the time of year where I have my meltdown saying I can't handle life. Typically, I do have a lot of stressful things going on, and it is just the culmination of when I can't handle anything else. March is hectic at work,and there are no scheduled days off. I have a number of birthdays that fall in this period of time as well. My father in law is still in medical rehab, and not doing as well as I would like. The girls and Marvin keep getting sick. I am having to deal with bleeding disorders and food allergies; meal preperation sucks. My allergies are flaring up terribly and I feel awful!!! I am having to make major educational decisions that will greatly influence Punky's future. I hardly get to see Marvin when he's working, for his schedule is opposite mine. I love my job terribly while I am there, but dread going to it when I am home. I will probably cry myself to sleep tonight because I feel so stressed.

However, by Easter, I will begin to relax, and every other week until the end of the school year will either have a half day or a day off until summer. Somehow, I think I will survive.